How to deal with an abusive professor?











up vote
13
down vote

favorite
1












I am a beginning graduate student in Mathematics. I have a professor who always brings up the fact that my GPA is not great in my undergraduate degree even though my performance is above the norm in the institution I am enrolled at the moment, so far I got straight A's in the graduate courses that I have completed. He always tries to point out at my flaws in my undergraduate years to humiliate me in front of other professors and my colleagues. What would be a wise replyreaction to such abuse?



I feel bad about it cause I feel like I am harassed and I don't reply.
I am also currently taking a course with that professor.










share|improve this question




















  • 2




    Unfortunately, you cannot amend professors' mentality or their behaviour, so you have to ignore them if you would like to continue; it would be better to change this supervisor as he will never change. I am one of many and not last who had burnt out from abusive supervisors. You can also edit your question, mentioning whether you have other options for the possibility of PI changing.
    – Monika
    11 hours ago












  • Have you asked him why he thinks it's relevant to your graduate position?
    – JMac
    5 hours ago










  • Related: How to deal with an abusive advisor?
    – Rebecca J. Stones
    10 mins ago















up vote
13
down vote

favorite
1












I am a beginning graduate student in Mathematics. I have a professor who always brings up the fact that my GPA is not great in my undergraduate degree even though my performance is above the norm in the institution I am enrolled at the moment, so far I got straight A's in the graduate courses that I have completed. He always tries to point out at my flaws in my undergraduate years to humiliate me in front of other professors and my colleagues. What would be a wise replyreaction to such abuse?



I feel bad about it cause I feel like I am harassed and I don't reply.
I am also currently taking a course with that professor.










share|improve this question




















  • 2




    Unfortunately, you cannot amend professors' mentality or their behaviour, so you have to ignore them if you would like to continue; it would be better to change this supervisor as he will never change. I am one of many and not last who had burnt out from abusive supervisors. You can also edit your question, mentioning whether you have other options for the possibility of PI changing.
    – Monika
    11 hours ago












  • Have you asked him why he thinks it's relevant to your graduate position?
    – JMac
    5 hours ago










  • Related: How to deal with an abusive advisor?
    – Rebecca J. Stones
    10 mins ago













up vote
13
down vote

favorite
1









up vote
13
down vote

favorite
1






1





I am a beginning graduate student in Mathematics. I have a professor who always brings up the fact that my GPA is not great in my undergraduate degree even though my performance is above the norm in the institution I am enrolled at the moment, so far I got straight A's in the graduate courses that I have completed. He always tries to point out at my flaws in my undergraduate years to humiliate me in front of other professors and my colleagues. What would be a wise replyreaction to such abuse?



I feel bad about it cause I feel like I am harassed and I don't reply.
I am also currently taking a course with that professor.










share|improve this question















I am a beginning graduate student in Mathematics. I have a professor who always brings up the fact that my GPA is not great in my undergraduate degree even though my performance is above the norm in the institution I am enrolled at the moment, so far I got straight A's in the graduate courses that I have completed. He always tries to point out at my flaws in my undergraduate years to humiliate me in front of other professors and my colleagues. What would be a wise replyreaction to such abuse?



I feel bad about it cause I feel like I am harassed and I don't reply.
I am also currently taking a course with that professor.







graduate-school abuse






share|improve this question















share|improve this question













share|improve this question




share|improve this question








edited 11 hours ago

























asked 11 hours ago









HybridAlien

8517




8517








  • 2




    Unfortunately, you cannot amend professors' mentality or their behaviour, so you have to ignore them if you would like to continue; it would be better to change this supervisor as he will never change. I am one of many and not last who had burnt out from abusive supervisors. You can also edit your question, mentioning whether you have other options for the possibility of PI changing.
    – Monika
    11 hours ago












  • Have you asked him why he thinks it's relevant to your graduate position?
    – JMac
    5 hours ago










  • Related: How to deal with an abusive advisor?
    – Rebecca J. Stones
    10 mins ago














  • 2




    Unfortunately, you cannot amend professors' mentality or their behaviour, so you have to ignore them if you would like to continue; it would be better to change this supervisor as he will never change. I am one of many and not last who had burnt out from abusive supervisors. You can also edit your question, mentioning whether you have other options for the possibility of PI changing.
    – Monika
    11 hours ago












  • Have you asked him why he thinks it's relevant to your graduate position?
    – JMac
    5 hours ago










  • Related: How to deal with an abusive advisor?
    – Rebecca J. Stones
    10 mins ago








2




2




Unfortunately, you cannot amend professors' mentality or their behaviour, so you have to ignore them if you would like to continue; it would be better to change this supervisor as he will never change. I am one of many and not last who had burnt out from abusive supervisors. You can also edit your question, mentioning whether you have other options for the possibility of PI changing.
– Monika
11 hours ago






Unfortunately, you cannot amend professors' mentality or their behaviour, so you have to ignore them if you would like to continue; it would be better to change this supervisor as he will never change. I am one of many and not last who had burnt out from abusive supervisors. You can also edit your question, mentioning whether you have other options for the possibility of PI changing.
– Monika
11 hours ago














Have you asked him why he thinks it's relevant to your graduate position?
– JMac
5 hours ago




Have you asked him why he thinks it's relevant to your graduate position?
– JMac
5 hours ago












Related: How to deal with an abusive advisor?
– Rebecca J. Stones
10 mins ago




Related: How to deal with an abusive advisor?
– Rebecca J. Stones
10 mins ago










4 Answers
4






active

oldest

votes

















up vote
18
down vote



accepted










If you are in the US, he's violating FERPA by revealing your academic record. Other countries have similar privacy laws. File a FERPA complaint and wipe that smug smile off his face.



Edit: As I understand the OP, he is being publicly shamed (in front of fellow grad students) by this prof by dint of his undergrad record. Likely consequences? I'm no expert and I suspect each school is different. But this is a federal law and I think most schools would take such a blatant violation seriously. I'm pretty sure this prof would get his leash yanked pretty hard. I have some experience:



When I taught small classes, I would write all the test scores on the board, so that students could see where they ranked. One young lady thought I was violating FERPA with this tattled on me. I got hauled into the chairs office where he was accompanied with one of those university JD types (the law students who never pass the bar, but get jobs at universities being annoying.) and the dean. They were ready to have a field day with me. They had already talked to other students and had corroboration that I had, in fact, written all the scores on the board. The JD was salivating.



We talked at cross purposes for a while, then they figured out that I was writing numbers only. No names. No personal information was being displayed. They were so disappointed. An administrator gets to be administrative so rarely and here they had an open-and-shut case go up in smoke.



So the point here is that at this school at this time, FERPA violations were a big deal. I suspect that in the current safe-room environment, they might be a bigger deal. Telling the class that that guy right there has a low GPA could traumatize him for life, eh?



That's all I got.






share|improve this answer



















  • 1




    Probably this is not the wisest approach, but it's a great point, and I'm upvoting because it's the advice I'd actually take.
    – Noah Snyder
    7 hours ago






  • 3




    @NoahSnyder Yes, it could backfire. The OP could make an enemy who will make his graduate experience miserable. But I'm betting against it. There have been a number of times when I just let a jerk be a jerk because I thought my life would go more smoothly, but found out later that if I had stood up for myself, I would have gotten a standing ovation from 99% of the people around me. This prof is a jerk and his colleagues will likely appreciate him being called out.
    – B. Goddard
    6 hours ago








  • 1




    For completion's sake (and I guess mine too), would you mind fleshing out a little more how a FERPA complaint would play out? Namely, the possible outcomes and maybe how likely each is? For example, if you said "he'll probably know it was you and it's likely little more would come of it than a write-up on his record," well that's probably not worth one smug grin.
    – Lord Farquaad
    4 hours ago










  • AFAIK, FERPA regulations do not prohibit faculty talking among themselves. They do define what cannot be revealed publicly.
    – Jeffrey J Weimer
    4 hours ago










  • Not "could backfire", but "wlll backfire". You might be able to stop someone talking in public, but you can't stop talk behind closed doors, and you can't stop what people think. There are plenty of ways "the system" can hit back against you without giving you any reasons that you can complain about.
    – alephzero
    3 hours ago


















up vote
25
down vote













There are several possibilities. Some may be appropriate. Some may work. Or not.



Avoidance. If possible, just avoid this person. Don't have anything to do with him. Difficult, I know. There are probably limited options to do that.



Ignore his taunts. My guess is that he disgraces himself when he does this. If he does this publicly, other students probably see it for what it is. But a public, angry, response from you would probably do yourself more harm than it is worth.



Formal Complaint. This will have consequences all 'round, but might be effective. His department chair might be interested to hear what you have to say, especially if the professor is un-tenured. But a complaint from a group of students would be more effective than one from a single student. And make the complaint in person or using a formal mail. Email is too easy to ignore, for this.



Try not to feel bad. The actions of the prof are inexcusable and aren't due to anything in you or that you can actually correct. Know it for what it is: unprofessional behavior.






share|improve this answer

















  • 5




    I'd vote for "ignore", combined with continuing to get A's (and ultimately writing a superb thesis). This professor's negative comments will look sillier and sillier as more of his colleagues see you doing A work.
    – Andreas Blass
    10 hours ago






  • 3




    From experience dealing with bullies, ignoring them just makes them feel more empowered to do what they're doing. I would really not recommend it. Also, if you don't present the relevant facts, people will assume that the information they're hearing is correct -- after all, if it was wrong, wouldn't you be pointing that out?
    – Nic Hartley
    5 hours ago






  • 1




    +1. I'd go straight to the student affairs office and lodge a complaint. Harassment is never okay.
    – bwDraco
    4 hours ago








  • 1




    @JeffreyJWeimer, that might be fine in private or in a conference with the department head. In public it might not be wise. Retaliation by the powerful can be pretty devastating. Sometimes you just need to act (or don't act) strategically in your own interests. I find it ok to suggest this action, but hesitate to recommend it without knowing the personalities.
    – Buffy
    3 hours ago






  • 2




    @JeffreyJWeimer If you want to play barrack-room lawyer, you had better be sure you will always be on the right side of the letter of the law for the rest of your stay in the institution. Don't expect to be cut any slack if you are not! Tl:dr: only fight battles you KNOW you will win.
    – alephzero
    3 hours ago


















up vote
0
down vote













Seek advice from a trusted mentor.



If you have another professor or advisor who you believe you can speak to about this, I would encourage you to explore that option. Not only is it important to have a positive influence to counteract the negative impact of this professor in your personal development, but quality mentorship is also a component in your future career success.



A mentor who has already passed these trials and tribulations in their career may have very well witnessed and experienced these same behaviors. They can offer a more informed plan for how to treat this with your best interests in mind. What your mentor advises may boil down to the same options @Buffy has laid-out. In the case that you should choose formal action, a mentor supporting you in this could be very influential in how it concludes.



One of the unfortunate realities of academia currently is that institutional mechanisms to discourage and rectify this type of behavior are (in my opinion) rare and frequently ineffective. For better or worse, your professors often have an inordinate amount of influence on your career once you are at the graduate level. For this reason, it's really difficult for a student to utilize formal recourse options. Some schools do have specific anti-bullying resources, and you should investigate if these exist at your institution.






share|improve this answer




























    up vote
    -1
    down vote













    It would appear that he is trying to shame you to make himself feel better. This is not unusual behaviour, though you would hope for better from a senior academic. One solution is to call him on it enough to stop it but not enough to make an enemy of him:



    "Yes, my GPA was indeed 3.0. That seems to have really caught your attention because you've mentioned it the last 9 times we've met. I wonder why it stuck in your mind so much...




    • Did you perhaps also get 3.0 when you did your degree?

    • Is 3.0 also your lucky number?

    • I bet you're wondering how I went from a 3.0 to straight AAAs. Well, I started taking amphetamines like Paul Erdos.

    • etc."


    I would not try to emphasis that you are getting great grades now. The important bit is to call him on his GPA-focus, particularly if there are other people around. Do it in a manner which suggests that you are genuinely curious about why he is mentioning it, rather than letting him know that it irks you.






    share|improve this answer








    New contributor




    FiddleStix is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
    Check out our Code of Conduct.














    • 11




      Sorry, but this approach seems to be extremely dangerous. Poking the tiger, so to speak, when the tiger isn't caged.
      – Buffy
      7 hours ago






    • 1




      @Buffy I completely agree. These ripostes work with a peer, but not with someone much higher up in the hierarchy. Stay away from them. Unfortunately, they will continue doing so - maybe as a power game or maybe for snobbism (not the same thing). You may take notes and go to an ombudsperson if your career depends on it, but if not, just avoid them.
      – Captain Emacs
      6 hours ago










    • This would be a stronger answer without the "I wonder why...." and following responses. I think "Yes, my GPA was indeed 3.0. You've mentioned that a few times now since we've met." is a good start, but you might want to finish with something closer to "I've been working hard to improve since then, and I was hoping my strong graduate performance so far would supplant that. Is there something else I'm supposed to be doing?" I agree you want to "call him on it enough to stop it but not enough to make an enemy of him", but I don't think your answer does that.
      – Lord Farquaad
      4 hours ago













    Your Answer








    StackExchange.ready(function() {
    var channelOptions = {
    tags: "".split(" "),
    id: "415"
    };
    initTagRenderer("".split(" "), "".split(" "), channelOptions);

    StackExchange.using("externalEditor", function() {
    // Have to fire editor after snippets, if snippets enabled
    if (StackExchange.settings.snippets.snippetsEnabled) {
    StackExchange.using("snippets", function() {
    createEditor();
    });
    }
    else {
    createEditor();
    }
    });

    function createEditor() {
    StackExchange.prepareEditor({
    heartbeatType: 'answer',
    convertImagesToLinks: true,
    noModals: true,
    showLowRepImageUploadWarning: true,
    reputationToPostImages: 10,
    bindNavPrevention: true,
    postfix: "",
    imageUploader: {
    brandingHtml: "Powered by u003ca class="icon-imgur-white" href="https://imgur.com/"u003eu003c/au003e",
    contentPolicyHtml: "User contributions licensed under u003ca href="https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/"u003ecc by-sa 3.0 with attribution requiredu003c/au003e u003ca href="https://stackoverflow.com/legal/content-policy"u003e(content policy)u003c/au003e",
    allowUrls: true
    },
    noCode: true, onDemand: true,
    discardSelector: ".discard-answer"
    ,immediatelyShowMarkdownHelp:true
    });


    }
    });














     

    draft saved


    draft discarded


















    StackExchange.ready(
    function () {
    StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2facademia.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f120326%2fhow-to-deal-with-an-abusive-professor%23new-answer', 'question_page');
    }
    );

    Post as a guest















    Required, but never shown

























    4 Answers
    4






    active

    oldest

    votes








    4 Answers
    4






    active

    oldest

    votes









    active

    oldest

    votes






    active

    oldest

    votes








    up vote
    18
    down vote



    accepted










    If you are in the US, he's violating FERPA by revealing your academic record. Other countries have similar privacy laws. File a FERPA complaint and wipe that smug smile off his face.



    Edit: As I understand the OP, he is being publicly shamed (in front of fellow grad students) by this prof by dint of his undergrad record. Likely consequences? I'm no expert and I suspect each school is different. But this is a federal law and I think most schools would take such a blatant violation seriously. I'm pretty sure this prof would get his leash yanked pretty hard. I have some experience:



    When I taught small classes, I would write all the test scores on the board, so that students could see where they ranked. One young lady thought I was violating FERPA with this tattled on me. I got hauled into the chairs office where he was accompanied with one of those university JD types (the law students who never pass the bar, but get jobs at universities being annoying.) and the dean. They were ready to have a field day with me. They had already talked to other students and had corroboration that I had, in fact, written all the scores on the board. The JD was salivating.



    We talked at cross purposes for a while, then they figured out that I was writing numbers only. No names. No personal information was being displayed. They were so disappointed. An administrator gets to be administrative so rarely and here they had an open-and-shut case go up in smoke.



    So the point here is that at this school at this time, FERPA violations were a big deal. I suspect that in the current safe-room environment, they might be a bigger deal. Telling the class that that guy right there has a low GPA could traumatize him for life, eh?



    That's all I got.






    share|improve this answer



















    • 1




      Probably this is not the wisest approach, but it's a great point, and I'm upvoting because it's the advice I'd actually take.
      – Noah Snyder
      7 hours ago






    • 3




      @NoahSnyder Yes, it could backfire. The OP could make an enemy who will make his graduate experience miserable. But I'm betting against it. There have been a number of times when I just let a jerk be a jerk because I thought my life would go more smoothly, but found out later that if I had stood up for myself, I would have gotten a standing ovation from 99% of the people around me. This prof is a jerk and his colleagues will likely appreciate him being called out.
      – B. Goddard
      6 hours ago








    • 1




      For completion's sake (and I guess mine too), would you mind fleshing out a little more how a FERPA complaint would play out? Namely, the possible outcomes and maybe how likely each is? For example, if you said "he'll probably know it was you and it's likely little more would come of it than a write-up on his record," well that's probably not worth one smug grin.
      – Lord Farquaad
      4 hours ago










    • AFAIK, FERPA regulations do not prohibit faculty talking among themselves. They do define what cannot be revealed publicly.
      – Jeffrey J Weimer
      4 hours ago










    • Not "could backfire", but "wlll backfire". You might be able to stop someone talking in public, but you can't stop talk behind closed doors, and you can't stop what people think. There are plenty of ways "the system" can hit back against you without giving you any reasons that you can complain about.
      – alephzero
      3 hours ago















    up vote
    18
    down vote



    accepted










    If you are in the US, he's violating FERPA by revealing your academic record. Other countries have similar privacy laws. File a FERPA complaint and wipe that smug smile off his face.



    Edit: As I understand the OP, he is being publicly shamed (in front of fellow grad students) by this prof by dint of his undergrad record. Likely consequences? I'm no expert and I suspect each school is different. But this is a federal law and I think most schools would take such a blatant violation seriously. I'm pretty sure this prof would get his leash yanked pretty hard. I have some experience:



    When I taught small classes, I would write all the test scores on the board, so that students could see where they ranked. One young lady thought I was violating FERPA with this tattled on me. I got hauled into the chairs office where he was accompanied with one of those university JD types (the law students who never pass the bar, but get jobs at universities being annoying.) and the dean. They were ready to have a field day with me. They had already talked to other students and had corroboration that I had, in fact, written all the scores on the board. The JD was salivating.



    We talked at cross purposes for a while, then they figured out that I was writing numbers only. No names. No personal information was being displayed. They were so disappointed. An administrator gets to be administrative so rarely and here they had an open-and-shut case go up in smoke.



    So the point here is that at this school at this time, FERPA violations were a big deal. I suspect that in the current safe-room environment, they might be a bigger deal. Telling the class that that guy right there has a low GPA could traumatize him for life, eh?



    That's all I got.






    share|improve this answer



















    • 1




      Probably this is not the wisest approach, but it's a great point, and I'm upvoting because it's the advice I'd actually take.
      – Noah Snyder
      7 hours ago






    • 3




      @NoahSnyder Yes, it could backfire. The OP could make an enemy who will make his graduate experience miserable. But I'm betting against it. There have been a number of times when I just let a jerk be a jerk because I thought my life would go more smoothly, but found out later that if I had stood up for myself, I would have gotten a standing ovation from 99% of the people around me. This prof is a jerk and his colleagues will likely appreciate him being called out.
      – B. Goddard
      6 hours ago








    • 1




      For completion's sake (and I guess mine too), would you mind fleshing out a little more how a FERPA complaint would play out? Namely, the possible outcomes and maybe how likely each is? For example, if you said "he'll probably know it was you and it's likely little more would come of it than a write-up on his record," well that's probably not worth one smug grin.
      – Lord Farquaad
      4 hours ago










    • AFAIK, FERPA regulations do not prohibit faculty talking among themselves. They do define what cannot be revealed publicly.
      – Jeffrey J Weimer
      4 hours ago










    • Not "could backfire", but "wlll backfire". You might be able to stop someone talking in public, but you can't stop talk behind closed doors, and you can't stop what people think. There are plenty of ways "the system" can hit back against you without giving you any reasons that you can complain about.
      – alephzero
      3 hours ago













    up vote
    18
    down vote



    accepted







    up vote
    18
    down vote



    accepted






    If you are in the US, he's violating FERPA by revealing your academic record. Other countries have similar privacy laws. File a FERPA complaint and wipe that smug smile off his face.



    Edit: As I understand the OP, he is being publicly shamed (in front of fellow grad students) by this prof by dint of his undergrad record. Likely consequences? I'm no expert and I suspect each school is different. But this is a federal law and I think most schools would take such a blatant violation seriously. I'm pretty sure this prof would get his leash yanked pretty hard. I have some experience:



    When I taught small classes, I would write all the test scores on the board, so that students could see where they ranked. One young lady thought I was violating FERPA with this tattled on me. I got hauled into the chairs office where he was accompanied with one of those university JD types (the law students who never pass the bar, but get jobs at universities being annoying.) and the dean. They were ready to have a field day with me. They had already talked to other students and had corroboration that I had, in fact, written all the scores on the board. The JD was salivating.



    We talked at cross purposes for a while, then they figured out that I was writing numbers only. No names. No personal information was being displayed. They were so disappointed. An administrator gets to be administrative so rarely and here they had an open-and-shut case go up in smoke.



    So the point here is that at this school at this time, FERPA violations were a big deal. I suspect that in the current safe-room environment, they might be a bigger deal. Telling the class that that guy right there has a low GPA could traumatize him for life, eh?



    That's all I got.






    share|improve this answer














    If you are in the US, he's violating FERPA by revealing your academic record. Other countries have similar privacy laws. File a FERPA complaint and wipe that smug smile off his face.



    Edit: As I understand the OP, he is being publicly shamed (in front of fellow grad students) by this prof by dint of his undergrad record. Likely consequences? I'm no expert and I suspect each school is different. But this is a federal law and I think most schools would take such a blatant violation seriously. I'm pretty sure this prof would get his leash yanked pretty hard. I have some experience:



    When I taught small classes, I would write all the test scores on the board, so that students could see where they ranked. One young lady thought I was violating FERPA with this tattled on me. I got hauled into the chairs office where he was accompanied with one of those university JD types (the law students who never pass the bar, but get jobs at universities being annoying.) and the dean. They were ready to have a field day with me. They had already talked to other students and had corroboration that I had, in fact, written all the scores on the board. The JD was salivating.



    We talked at cross purposes for a while, then they figured out that I was writing numbers only. No names. No personal information was being displayed. They were so disappointed. An administrator gets to be administrative so rarely and here they had an open-and-shut case go up in smoke.



    So the point here is that at this school at this time, FERPA violations were a big deal. I suspect that in the current safe-room environment, they might be a bigger deal. Telling the class that that guy right there has a low GPA could traumatize him for life, eh?



    That's all I got.







    share|improve this answer














    share|improve this answer



    share|improve this answer








    edited 4 hours ago

























    answered 7 hours ago









    B. Goddard

    3,9021716




    3,9021716








    • 1




      Probably this is not the wisest approach, but it's a great point, and I'm upvoting because it's the advice I'd actually take.
      – Noah Snyder
      7 hours ago






    • 3




      @NoahSnyder Yes, it could backfire. The OP could make an enemy who will make his graduate experience miserable. But I'm betting against it. There have been a number of times when I just let a jerk be a jerk because I thought my life would go more smoothly, but found out later that if I had stood up for myself, I would have gotten a standing ovation from 99% of the people around me. This prof is a jerk and his colleagues will likely appreciate him being called out.
      – B. Goddard
      6 hours ago








    • 1




      For completion's sake (and I guess mine too), would you mind fleshing out a little more how a FERPA complaint would play out? Namely, the possible outcomes and maybe how likely each is? For example, if you said "he'll probably know it was you and it's likely little more would come of it than a write-up on his record," well that's probably not worth one smug grin.
      – Lord Farquaad
      4 hours ago










    • AFAIK, FERPA regulations do not prohibit faculty talking among themselves. They do define what cannot be revealed publicly.
      – Jeffrey J Weimer
      4 hours ago










    • Not "could backfire", but "wlll backfire". You might be able to stop someone talking in public, but you can't stop talk behind closed doors, and you can't stop what people think. There are plenty of ways "the system" can hit back against you without giving you any reasons that you can complain about.
      – alephzero
      3 hours ago














    • 1




      Probably this is not the wisest approach, but it's a great point, and I'm upvoting because it's the advice I'd actually take.
      – Noah Snyder
      7 hours ago






    • 3




      @NoahSnyder Yes, it could backfire. The OP could make an enemy who will make his graduate experience miserable. But I'm betting against it. There have been a number of times when I just let a jerk be a jerk because I thought my life would go more smoothly, but found out later that if I had stood up for myself, I would have gotten a standing ovation from 99% of the people around me. This prof is a jerk and his colleagues will likely appreciate him being called out.
      – B. Goddard
      6 hours ago








    • 1




      For completion's sake (and I guess mine too), would you mind fleshing out a little more how a FERPA complaint would play out? Namely, the possible outcomes and maybe how likely each is? For example, if you said "he'll probably know it was you and it's likely little more would come of it than a write-up on his record," well that's probably not worth one smug grin.
      – Lord Farquaad
      4 hours ago










    • AFAIK, FERPA regulations do not prohibit faculty talking among themselves. They do define what cannot be revealed publicly.
      – Jeffrey J Weimer
      4 hours ago










    • Not "could backfire", but "wlll backfire". You might be able to stop someone talking in public, but you can't stop talk behind closed doors, and you can't stop what people think. There are plenty of ways "the system" can hit back against you without giving you any reasons that you can complain about.
      – alephzero
      3 hours ago








    1




    1




    Probably this is not the wisest approach, but it's a great point, and I'm upvoting because it's the advice I'd actually take.
    – Noah Snyder
    7 hours ago




    Probably this is not the wisest approach, but it's a great point, and I'm upvoting because it's the advice I'd actually take.
    – Noah Snyder
    7 hours ago




    3




    3




    @NoahSnyder Yes, it could backfire. The OP could make an enemy who will make his graduate experience miserable. But I'm betting against it. There have been a number of times when I just let a jerk be a jerk because I thought my life would go more smoothly, but found out later that if I had stood up for myself, I would have gotten a standing ovation from 99% of the people around me. This prof is a jerk and his colleagues will likely appreciate him being called out.
    – B. Goddard
    6 hours ago






    @NoahSnyder Yes, it could backfire. The OP could make an enemy who will make his graduate experience miserable. But I'm betting against it. There have been a number of times when I just let a jerk be a jerk because I thought my life would go more smoothly, but found out later that if I had stood up for myself, I would have gotten a standing ovation from 99% of the people around me. This prof is a jerk and his colleagues will likely appreciate him being called out.
    – B. Goddard
    6 hours ago






    1




    1




    For completion's sake (and I guess mine too), would you mind fleshing out a little more how a FERPA complaint would play out? Namely, the possible outcomes and maybe how likely each is? For example, if you said "he'll probably know it was you and it's likely little more would come of it than a write-up on his record," well that's probably not worth one smug grin.
    – Lord Farquaad
    4 hours ago




    For completion's sake (and I guess mine too), would you mind fleshing out a little more how a FERPA complaint would play out? Namely, the possible outcomes and maybe how likely each is? For example, if you said "he'll probably know it was you and it's likely little more would come of it than a write-up on his record," well that's probably not worth one smug grin.
    – Lord Farquaad
    4 hours ago












    AFAIK, FERPA regulations do not prohibit faculty talking among themselves. They do define what cannot be revealed publicly.
    – Jeffrey J Weimer
    4 hours ago




    AFAIK, FERPA regulations do not prohibit faculty talking among themselves. They do define what cannot be revealed publicly.
    – Jeffrey J Weimer
    4 hours ago












    Not "could backfire", but "wlll backfire". You might be able to stop someone talking in public, but you can't stop talk behind closed doors, and you can't stop what people think. There are plenty of ways "the system" can hit back against you without giving you any reasons that you can complain about.
    – alephzero
    3 hours ago




    Not "could backfire", but "wlll backfire". You might be able to stop someone talking in public, but you can't stop talk behind closed doors, and you can't stop what people think. There are plenty of ways "the system" can hit back against you without giving you any reasons that you can complain about.
    – alephzero
    3 hours ago










    up vote
    25
    down vote













    There are several possibilities. Some may be appropriate. Some may work. Or not.



    Avoidance. If possible, just avoid this person. Don't have anything to do with him. Difficult, I know. There are probably limited options to do that.



    Ignore his taunts. My guess is that he disgraces himself when he does this. If he does this publicly, other students probably see it for what it is. But a public, angry, response from you would probably do yourself more harm than it is worth.



    Formal Complaint. This will have consequences all 'round, but might be effective. His department chair might be interested to hear what you have to say, especially if the professor is un-tenured. But a complaint from a group of students would be more effective than one from a single student. And make the complaint in person or using a formal mail. Email is too easy to ignore, for this.



    Try not to feel bad. The actions of the prof are inexcusable and aren't due to anything in you or that you can actually correct. Know it for what it is: unprofessional behavior.






    share|improve this answer

















    • 5




      I'd vote for "ignore", combined with continuing to get A's (and ultimately writing a superb thesis). This professor's negative comments will look sillier and sillier as more of his colleagues see you doing A work.
      – Andreas Blass
      10 hours ago






    • 3




      From experience dealing with bullies, ignoring them just makes them feel more empowered to do what they're doing. I would really not recommend it. Also, if you don't present the relevant facts, people will assume that the information they're hearing is correct -- after all, if it was wrong, wouldn't you be pointing that out?
      – Nic Hartley
      5 hours ago






    • 1




      +1. I'd go straight to the student affairs office and lodge a complaint. Harassment is never okay.
      – bwDraco
      4 hours ago








    • 1




      @JeffreyJWeimer, that might be fine in private or in a conference with the department head. In public it might not be wise. Retaliation by the powerful can be pretty devastating. Sometimes you just need to act (or don't act) strategically in your own interests. I find it ok to suggest this action, but hesitate to recommend it without knowing the personalities.
      – Buffy
      3 hours ago






    • 2




      @JeffreyJWeimer If you want to play barrack-room lawyer, you had better be sure you will always be on the right side of the letter of the law for the rest of your stay in the institution. Don't expect to be cut any slack if you are not! Tl:dr: only fight battles you KNOW you will win.
      – alephzero
      3 hours ago















    up vote
    25
    down vote













    There are several possibilities. Some may be appropriate. Some may work. Or not.



    Avoidance. If possible, just avoid this person. Don't have anything to do with him. Difficult, I know. There are probably limited options to do that.



    Ignore his taunts. My guess is that he disgraces himself when he does this. If he does this publicly, other students probably see it for what it is. But a public, angry, response from you would probably do yourself more harm than it is worth.



    Formal Complaint. This will have consequences all 'round, but might be effective. His department chair might be interested to hear what you have to say, especially if the professor is un-tenured. But a complaint from a group of students would be more effective than one from a single student. And make the complaint in person or using a formal mail. Email is too easy to ignore, for this.



    Try not to feel bad. The actions of the prof are inexcusable and aren't due to anything in you or that you can actually correct. Know it for what it is: unprofessional behavior.






    share|improve this answer

















    • 5




      I'd vote for "ignore", combined with continuing to get A's (and ultimately writing a superb thesis). This professor's negative comments will look sillier and sillier as more of his colleagues see you doing A work.
      – Andreas Blass
      10 hours ago






    • 3




      From experience dealing with bullies, ignoring them just makes them feel more empowered to do what they're doing. I would really not recommend it. Also, if you don't present the relevant facts, people will assume that the information they're hearing is correct -- after all, if it was wrong, wouldn't you be pointing that out?
      – Nic Hartley
      5 hours ago






    • 1




      +1. I'd go straight to the student affairs office and lodge a complaint. Harassment is never okay.
      – bwDraco
      4 hours ago








    • 1




      @JeffreyJWeimer, that might be fine in private or in a conference with the department head. In public it might not be wise. Retaliation by the powerful can be pretty devastating. Sometimes you just need to act (or don't act) strategically in your own interests. I find it ok to suggest this action, but hesitate to recommend it without knowing the personalities.
      – Buffy
      3 hours ago






    • 2




      @JeffreyJWeimer If you want to play barrack-room lawyer, you had better be sure you will always be on the right side of the letter of the law for the rest of your stay in the institution. Don't expect to be cut any slack if you are not! Tl:dr: only fight battles you KNOW you will win.
      – alephzero
      3 hours ago













    up vote
    25
    down vote










    up vote
    25
    down vote









    There are several possibilities. Some may be appropriate. Some may work. Or not.



    Avoidance. If possible, just avoid this person. Don't have anything to do with him. Difficult, I know. There are probably limited options to do that.



    Ignore his taunts. My guess is that he disgraces himself when he does this. If he does this publicly, other students probably see it for what it is. But a public, angry, response from you would probably do yourself more harm than it is worth.



    Formal Complaint. This will have consequences all 'round, but might be effective. His department chair might be interested to hear what you have to say, especially if the professor is un-tenured. But a complaint from a group of students would be more effective than one from a single student. And make the complaint in person or using a formal mail. Email is too easy to ignore, for this.



    Try not to feel bad. The actions of the prof are inexcusable and aren't due to anything in you or that you can actually correct. Know it for what it is: unprofessional behavior.






    share|improve this answer












    There are several possibilities. Some may be appropriate. Some may work. Or not.



    Avoidance. If possible, just avoid this person. Don't have anything to do with him. Difficult, I know. There are probably limited options to do that.



    Ignore his taunts. My guess is that he disgraces himself when he does this. If he does this publicly, other students probably see it for what it is. But a public, angry, response from you would probably do yourself more harm than it is worth.



    Formal Complaint. This will have consequences all 'round, but might be effective. His department chair might be interested to hear what you have to say, especially if the professor is un-tenured. But a complaint from a group of students would be more effective than one from a single student. And make the complaint in person or using a formal mail. Email is too easy to ignore, for this.



    Try not to feel bad. The actions of the prof are inexcusable and aren't due to anything in you or that you can actually correct. Know it for what it is: unprofessional behavior.







    share|improve this answer












    share|improve this answer



    share|improve this answer










    answered 11 hours ago









    Buffy

    29.6k694157




    29.6k694157








    • 5




      I'd vote for "ignore", combined with continuing to get A's (and ultimately writing a superb thesis). This professor's negative comments will look sillier and sillier as more of his colleagues see you doing A work.
      – Andreas Blass
      10 hours ago






    • 3




      From experience dealing with bullies, ignoring them just makes them feel more empowered to do what they're doing. I would really not recommend it. Also, if you don't present the relevant facts, people will assume that the information they're hearing is correct -- after all, if it was wrong, wouldn't you be pointing that out?
      – Nic Hartley
      5 hours ago






    • 1




      +1. I'd go straight to the student affairs office and lodge a complaint. Harassment is never okay.
      – bwDraco
      4 hours ago








    • 1




      @JeffreyJWeimer, that might be fine in private or in a conference with the department head. In public it might not be wise. Retaliation by the powerful can be pretty devastating. Sometimes you just need to act (or don't act) strategically in your own interests. I find it ok to suggest this action, but hesitate to recommend it without knowing the personalities.
      – Buffy
      3 hours ago






    • 2




      @JeffreyJWeimer If you want to play barrack-room lawyer, you had better be sure you will always be on the right side of the letter of the law for the rest of your stay in the institution. Don't expect to be cut any slack if you are not! Tl:dr: only fight battles you KNOW you will win.
      – alephzero
      3 hours ago














    • 5




      I'd vote for "ignore", combined with continuing to get A's (and ultimately writing a superb thesis). This professor's negative comments will look sillier and sillier as more of his colleagues see you doing A work.
      – Andreas Blass
      10 hours ago






    • 3




      From experience dealing with bullies, ignoring them just makes them feel more empowered to do what they're doing. I would really not recommend it. Also, if you don't present the relevant facts, people will assume that the information they're hearing is correct -- after all, if it was wrong, wouldn't you be pointing that out?
      – Nic Hartley
      5 hours ago






    • 1




      +1. I'd go straight to the student affairs office and lodge a complaint. Harassment is never okay.
      – bwDraco
      4 hours ago








    • 1




      @JeffreyJWeimer, that might be fine in private or in a conference with the department head. In public it might not be wise. Retaliation by the powerful can be pretty devastating. Sometimes you just need to act (or don't act) strategically in your own interests. I find it ok to suggest this action, but hesitate to recommend it without knowing the personalities.
      – Buffy
      3 hours ago






    • 2




      @JeffreyJWeimer If you want to play barrack-room lawyer, you had better be sure you will always be on the right side of the letter of the law for the rest of your stay in the institution. Don't expect to be cut any slack if you are not! Tl:dr: only fight battles you KNOW you will win.
      – alephzero
      3 hours ago








    5




    5




    I'd vote for "ignore", combined with continuing to get A's (and ultimately writing a superb thesis). This professor's negative comments will look sillier and sillier as more of his colleagues see you doing A work.
    – Andreas Blass
    10 hours ago




    I'd vote for "ignore", combined with continuing to get A's (and ultimately writing a superb thesis). This professor's negative comments will look sillier and sillier as more of his colleagues see you doing A work.
    – Andreas Blass
    10 hours ago




    3




    3




    From experience dealing with bullies, ignoring them just makes them feel more empowered to do what they're doing. I would really not recommend it. Also, if you don't present the relevant facts, people will assume that the information they're hearing is correct -- after all, if it was wrong, wouldn't you be pointing that out?
    – Nic Hartley
    5 hours ago




    From experience dealing with bullies, ignoring them just makes them feel more empowered to do what they're doing. I would really not recommend it. Also, if you don't present the relevant facts, people will assume that the information they're hearing is correct -- after all, if it was wrong, wouldn't you be pointing that out?
    – Nic Hartley
    5 hours ago




    1




    1




    +1. I'd go straight to the student affairs office and lodge a complaint. Harassment is never okay.
    – bwDraco
    4 hours ago






    +1. I'd go straight to the student affairs office and lodge a complaint. Harassment is never okay.
    – bwDraco
    4 hours ago






    1




    1




    @JeffreyJWeimer, that might be fine in private or in a conference with the department head. In public it might not be wise. Retaliation by the powerful can be pretty devastating. Sometimes you just need to act (or don't act) strategically in your own interests. I find it ok to suggest this action, but hesitate to recommend it without knowing the personalities.
    – Buffy
    3 hours ago




    @JeffreyJWeimer, that might be fine in private or in a conference with the department head. In public it might not be wise. Retaliation by the powerful can be pretty devastating. Sometimes you just need to act (or don't act) strategically in your own interests. I find it ok to suggest this action, but hesitate to recommend it without knowing the personalities.
    – Buffy
    3 hours ago




    2




    2




    @JeffreyJWeimer If you want to play barrack-room lawyer, you had better be sure you will always be on the right side of the letter of the law for the rest of your stay in the institution. Don't expect to be cut any slack if you are not! Tl:dr: only fight battles you KNOW you will win.
    – alephzero
    3 hours ago




    @JeffreyJWeimer If you want to play barrack-room lawyer, you had better be sure you will always be on the right side of the letter of the law for the rest of your stay in the institution. Don't expect to be cut any slack if you are not! Tl:dr: only fight battles you KNOW you will win.
    – alephzero
    3 hours ago










    up vote
    0
    down vote













    Seek advice from a trusted mentor.



    If you have another professor or advisor who you believe you can speak to about this, I would encourage you to explore that option. Not only is it important to have a positive influence to counteract the negative impact of this professor in your personal development, but quality mentorship is also a component in your future career success.



    A mentor who has already passed these trials and tribulations in their career may have very well witnessed and experienced these same behaviors. They can offer a more informed plan for how to treat this with your best interests in mind. What your mentor advises may boil down to the same options @Buffy has laid-out. In the case that you should choose formal action, a mentor supporting you in this could be very influential in how it concludes.



    One of the unfortunate realities of academia currently is that institutional mechanisms to discourage and rectify this type of behavior are (in my opinion) rare and frequently ineffective. For better or worse, your professors often have an inordinate amount of influence on your career once you are at the graduate level. For this reason, it's really difficult for a student to utilize formal recourse options. Some schools do have specific anti-bullying resources, and you should investigate if these exist at your institution.






    share|improve this answer

























      up vote
      0
      down vote













      Seek advice from a trusted mentor.



      If you have another professor or advisor who you believe you can speak to about this, I would encourage you to explore that option. Not only is it important to have a positive influence to counteract the negative impact of this professor in your personal development, but quality mentorship is also a component in your future career success.



      A mentor who has already passed these trials and tribulations in their career may have very well witnessed and experienced these same behaviors. They can offer a more informed plan for how to treat this with your best interests in mind. What your mentor advises may boil down to the same options @Buffy has laid-out. In the case that you should choose formal action, a mentor supporting you in this could be very influential in how it concludes.



      One of the unfortunate realities of academia currently is that institutional mechanisms to discourage and rectify this type of behavior are (in my opinion) rare and frequently ineffective. For better or worse, your professors often have an inordinate amount of influence on your career once you are at the graduate level. For this reason, it's really difficult for a student to utilize formal recourse options. Some schools do have specific anti-bullying resources, and you should investigate if these exist at your institution.






      share|improve this answer























        up vote
        0
        down vote










        up vote
        0
        down vote









        Seek advice from a trusted mentor.



        If you have another professor or advisor who you believe you can speak to about this, I would encourage you to explore that option. Not only is it important to have a positive influence to counteract the negative impact of this professor in your personal development, but quality mentorship is also a component in your future career success.



        A mentor who has already passed these trials and tribulations in their career may have very well witnessed and experienced these same behaviors. They can offer a more informed plan for how to treat this with your best interests in mind. What your mentor advises may boil down to the same options @Buffy has laid-out. In the case that you should choose formal action, a mentor supporting you in this could be very influential in how it concludes.



        One of the unfortunate realities of academia currently is that institutional mechanisms to discourage and rectify this type of behavior are (in my opinion) rare and frequently ineffective. For better or worse, your professors often have an inordinate amount of influence on your career once you are at the graduate level. For this reason, it's really difficult for a student to utilize formal recourse options. Some schools do have specific anti-bullying resources, and you should investigate if these exist at your institution.






        share|improve this answer












        Seek advice from a trusted mentor.



        If you have another professor or advisor who you believe you can speak to about this, I would encourage you to explore that option. Not only is it important to have a positive influence to counteract the negative impact of this professor in your personal development, but quality mentorship is also a component in your future career success.



        A mentor who has already passed these trials and tribulations in their career may have very well witnessed and experienced these same behaviors. They can offer a more informed plan for how to treat this with your best interests in mind. What your mentor advises may boil down to the same options @Buffy has laid-out. In the case that you should choose formal action, a mentor supporting you in this could be very influential in how it concludes.



        One of the unfortunate realities of academia currently is that institutional mechanisms to discourage and rectify this type of behavior are (in my opinion) rare and frequently ineffective. For better or worse, your professors often have an inordinate amount of influence on your career once you are at the graduate level. For this reason, it's really difficult for a student to utilize formal recourse options. Some schools do have specific anti-bullying resources, and you should investigate if these exist at your institution.







        share|improve this answer












        share|improve this answer



        share|improve this answer










        answered 1 hour ago









        Nathan

        111




        111






















            up vote
            -1
            down vote













            It would appear that he is trying to shame you to make himself feel better. This is not unusual behaviour, though you would hope for better from a senior academic. One solution is to call him on it enough to stop it but not enough to make an enemy of him:



            "Yes, my GPA was indeed 3.0. That seems to have really caught your attention because you've mentioned it the last 9 times we've met. I wonder why it stuck in your mind so much...




            • Did you perhaps also get 3.0 when you did your degree?

            • Is 3.0 also your lucky number?

            • I bet you're wondering how I went from a 3.0 to straight AAAs. Well, I started taking amphetamines like Paul Erdos.

            • etc."


            I would not try to emphasis that you are getting great grades now. The important bit is to call him on his GPA-focus, particularly if there are other people around. Do it in a manner which suggests that you are genuinely curious about why he is mentioning it, rather than letting him know that it irks you.






            share|improve this answer








            New contributor




            FiddleStix is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
            Check out our Code of Conduct.














            • 11




              Sorry, but this approach seems to be extremely dangerous. Poking the tiger, so to speak, when the tiger isn't caged.
              – Buffy
              7 hours ago






            • 1




              @Buffy I completely agree. These ripostes work with a peer, but not with someone much higher up in the hierarchy. Stay away from them. Unfortunately, they will continue doing so - maybe as a power game or maybe for snobbism (not the same thing). You may take notes and go to an ombudsperson if your career depends on it, but if not, just avoid them.
              – Captain Emacs
              6 hours ago










            • This would be a stronger answer without the "I wonder why...." and following responses. I think "Yes, my GPA was indeed 3.0. You've mentioned that a few times now since we've met." is a good start, but you might want to finish with something closer to "I've been working hard to improve since then, and I was hoping my strong graduate performance so far would supplant that. Is there something else I'm supposed to be doing?" I agree you want to "call him on it enough to stop it but not enough to make an enemy of him", but I don't think your answer does that.
              – Lord Farquaad
              4 hours ago

















            up vote
            -1
            down vote













            It would appear that he is trying to shame you to make himself feel better. This is not unusual behaviour, though you would hope for better from a senior academic. One solution is to call him on it enough to stop it but not enough to make an enemy of him:



            "Yes, my GPA was indeed 3.0. That seems to have really caught your attention because you've mentioned it the last 9 times we've met. I wonder why it stuck in your mind so much...




            • Did you perhaps also get 3.0 when you did your degree?

            • Is 3.0 also your lucky number?

            • I bet you're wondering how I went from a 3.0 to straight AAAs. Well, I started taking amphetamines like Paul Erdos.

            • etc."


            I would not try to emphasis that you are getting great grades now. The important bit is to call him on his GPA-focus, particularly if there are other people around. Do it in a manner which suggests that you are genuinely curious about why he is mentioning it, rather than letting him know that it irks you.






            share|improve this answer








            New contributor




            FiddleStix is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
            Check out our Code of Conduct.














            • 11




              Sorry, but this approach seems to be extremely dangerous. Poking the tiger, so to speak, when the tiger isn't caged.
              – Buffy
              7 hours ago






            • 1




              @Buffy I completely agree. These ripostes work with a peer, but not with someone much higher up in the hierarchy. Stay away from them. Unfortunately, they will continue doing so - maybe as a power game or maybe for snobbism (not the same thing). You may take notes and go to an ombudsperson if your career depends on it, but if not, just avoid them.
              – Captain Emacs
              6 hours ago










            • This would be a stronger answer without the "I wonder why...." and following responses. I think "Yes, my GPA was indeed 3.0. You've mentioned that a few times now since we've met." is a good start, but you might want to finish with something closer to "I've been working hard to improve since then, and I was hoping my strong graduate performance so far would supplant that. Is there something else I'm supposed to be doing?" I agree you want to "call him on it enough to stop it but not enough to make an enemy of him", but I don't think your answer does that.
              – Lord Farquaad
              4 hours ago















            up vote
            -1
            down vote










            up vote
            -1
            down vote









            It would appear that he is trying to shame you to make himself feel better. This is not unusual behaviour, though you would hope for better from a senior academic. One solution is to call him on it enough to stop it but not enough to make an enemy of him:



            "Yes, my GPA was indeed 3.0. That seems to have really caught your attention because you've mentioned it the last 9 times we've met. I wonder why it stuck in your mind so much...




            • Did you perhaps also get 3.0 when you did your degree?

            • Is 3.0 also your lucky number?

            • I bet you're wondering how I went from a 3.0 to straight AAAs. Well, I started taking amphetamines like Paul Erdos.

            • etc."


            I would not try to emphasis that you are getting great grades now. The important bit is to call him on his GPA-focus, particularly if there are other people around. Do it in a manner which suggests that you are genuinely curious about why he is mentioning it, rather than letting him know that it irks you.






            share|improve this answer








            New contributor




            FiddleStix is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
            Check out our Code of Conduct.









            It would appear that he is trying to shame you to make himself feel better. This is not unusual behaviour, though you would hope for better from a senior academic. One solution is to call him on it enough to stop it but not enough to make an enemy of him:



            "Yes, my GPA was indeed 3.0. That seems to have really caught your attention because you've mentioned it the last 9 times we've met. I wonder why it stuck in your mind so much...




            • Did you perhaps also get 3.0 when you did your degree?

            • Is 3.0 also your lucky number?

            • I bet you're wondering how I went from a 3.0 to straight AAAs. Well, I started taking amphetamines like Paul Erdos.

            • etc."


            I would not try to emphasis that you are getting great grades now. The important bit is to call him on his GPA-focus, particularly if there are other people around. Do it in a manner which suggests that you are genuinely curious about why he is mentioning it, rather than letting him know that it irks you.







            share|improve this answer








            New contributor




            FiddleStix is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
            Check out our Code of Conduct.









            share|improve this answer



            share|improve this answer






            New contributor




            FiddleStix is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
            Check out our Code of Conduct.









            answered 8 hours ago









            FiddleStix

            232




            232




            New contributor




            FiddleStix is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
            Check out our Code of Conduct.





            New contributor





            FiddleStix is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
            Check out our Code of Conduct.






            FiddleStix is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
            Check out our Code of Conduct.








            • 11




              Sorry, but this approach seems to be extremely dangerous. Poking the tiger, so to speak, when the tiger isn't caged.
              – Buffy
              7 hours ago






            • 1




              @Buffy I completely agree. These ripostes work with a peer, but not with someone much higher up in the hierarchy. Stay away from them. Unfortunately, they will continue doing so - maybe as a power game or maybe for snobbism (not the same thing). You may take notes and go to an ombudsperson if your career depends on it, but if not, just avoid them.
              – Captain Emacs
              6 hours ago










            • This would be a stronger answer without the "I wonder why...." and following responses. I think "Yes, my GPA was indeed 3.0. You've mentioned that a few times now since we've met." is a good start, but you might want to finish with something closer to "I've been working hard to improve since then, and I was hoping my strong graduate performance so far would supplant that. Is there something else I'm supposed to be doing?" I agree you want to "call him on it enough to stop it but not enough to make an enemy of him", but I don't think your answer does that.
              – Lord Farquaad
              4 hours ago
















            • 11




              Sorry, but this approach seems to be extremely dangerous. Poking the tiger, so to speak, when the tiger isn't caged.
              – Buffy
              7 hours ago






            • 1




              @Buffy I completely agree. These ripostes work with a peer, but not with someone much higher up in the hierarchy. Stay away from them. Unfortunately, they will continue doing so - maybe as a power game or maybe for snobbism (not the same thing). You may take notes and go to an ombudsperson if your career depends on it, but if not, just avoid them.
              – Captain Emacs
              6 hours ago










            • This would be a stronger answer without the "I wonder why...." and following responses. I think "Yes, my GPA was indeed 3.0. You've mentioned that a few times now since we've met." is a good start, but you might want to finish with something closer to "I've been working hard to improve since then, and I was hoping my strong graduate performance so far would supplant that. Is there something else I'm supposed to be doing?" I agree you want to "call him on it enough to stop it but not enough to make an enemy of him", but I don't think your answer does that.
              – Lord Farquaad
              4 hours ago










            11




            11




            Sorry, but this approach seems to be extremely dangerous. Poking the tiger, so to speak, when the tiger isn't caged.
            – Buffy
            7 hours ago




            Sorry, but this approach seems to be extremely dangerous. Poking the tiger, so to speak, when the tiger isn't caged.
            – Buffy
            7 hours ago




            1




            1




            @Buffy I completely agree. These ripostes work with a peer, but not with someone much higher up in the hierarchy. Stay away from them. Unfortunately, they will continue doing so - maybe as a power game or maybe for snobbism (not the same thing). You may take notes and go to an ombudsperson if your career depends on it, but if not, just avoid them.
            – Captain Emacs
            6 hours ago




            @Buffy I completely agree. These ripostes work with a peer, but not with someone much higher up in the hierarchy. Stay away from them. Unfortunately, they will continue doing so - maybe as a power game or maybe for snobbism (not the same thing). You may take notes and go to an ombudsperson if your career depends on it, but if not, just avoid them.
            – Captain Emacs
            6 hours ago












            This would be a stronger answer without the "I wonder why...." and following responses. I think "Yes, my GPA was indeed 3.0. You've mentioned that a few times now since we've met." is a good start, but you might want to finish with something closer to "I've been working hard to improve since then, and I was hoping my strong graduate performance so far would supplant that. Is there something else I'm supposed to be doing?" I agree you want to "call him on it enough to stop it but not enough to make an enemy of him", but I don't think your answer does that.
            – Lord Farquaad
            4 hours ago






            This would be a stronger answer without the "I wonder why...." and following responses. I think "Yes, my GPA was indeed 3.0. You've mentioned that a few times now since we've met." is a good start, but you might want to finish with something closer to "I've been working hard to improve since then, and I was hoping my strong graduate performance so far would supplant that. Is there something else I'm supposed to be doing?" I agree you want to "call him on it enough to stop it but not enough to make an enemy of him", but I don't think your answer does that.
            – Lord Farquaad
            4 hours ago




















             

            draft saved


            draft discarded



















































             


            draft saved


            draft discarded














            StackExchange.ready(
            function () {
            StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2facademia.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f120326%2fhow-to-deal-with-an-abusive-professor%23new-answer', 'question_page');
            }
            );

            Post as a guest















            Required, but never shown





















































            Required, but never shown














            Required, but never shown












            Required, but never shown







            Required, but never shown

































            Required, but never shown














            Required, but never shown












            Required, but never shown







            Required, but never shown







            Popular posts from this blog

            Cypress Hill

            what are some tips for doing well in the interview? [on hold]

            How does a super-power salesman not get shut down for legal reasons?